The fruit of the Spirit is…

self control 2 Timothy 2:1-7

How often do we hear “I couldn’t help it” in association with some act of over-indulgence: eating too much at Christmas, having that extra dozen chocolates, drinking too much at someone’s party. We hear it too with regard to losing our temper, saying something hurtful, even engaging in casual sex. It’s even been heard in church: inappropriate ministry foisted on someone because someone else couldn’t help it!

The fruit of the Spirit is could-help-it. That’s what self control means. Note that the Spirit gives us self control. He doesn’t take over and turn us into robots. We remain in control so that we can choose what God wants (see Phil 2:12-13; Acts 24:25).

US Christian psychologist William Backus says: “What characterizes self control is the ability to exercise restraint over your thoughts, feelings, desires and actions so as to achieve your long term goals. The self controlled person maintains progress towards a goal even when he is not in the mood, doesn’t feel like making the effort, would momentarily enjoy something else or finds working towards his goal downright unpleasant.”

Paul in 2 Ti 2:1-7 uses characters from three walks of life to stress to Timothy the importance of concentrating on his long term goals: pleasing God, fighting the good fight and winning the crown of righteousness (4:6-8) – and which are, therefore, pictures of self control.

1) The soldier (4)

Self control is about subordinating our own desires to the wishes of our commanding officer, steering clear of civilian entanglements, doing nothing to disgrace the uniform. As v3 makes clear this involves struggle and effort – nothing worthwhile is easy (ask someone who’s done basic training!)

Two key areas:

ü The tongue – Jas 3:1-12; Pr 11:13; 16:28; 18:8; 20:19; 26:20,22; 1 Ti 5:13. Gossip, scandal mongering, wild criticism, hasty judgments, sweeping generalizations, picking an argument, expletives, exaggeration, idle threats, empty promises: None of these honour our Lord. Christian talk should be along the lines of Eph 4:14-16,25,29,30-31. Note: be careful how prayer needs are shared!

ü Temper – ‘keep your temper, no one else wants it.’ Pr 16:32; 25:28. Self control is about keeping powerful passions under control.

2) The athlete (5)

Self control = training and discipline in order to achieve a goal, the crown (cf. 4:6-8). Starry-eyed dreaming doesn’t win medals, so athletes train every day. Likewise the Christian.

There are two key areas we need to be aware of:

i) the devotional life:

ü Thinking – It controls talk and temper; who controls it? See Pr 14:15; 21:29; Rom 12:3 renewal starts in the mind. The conquest of temptation is not conquest of things but thoughts: 2 Cor 10:5; Jas 1:13-16. How?

ü Scripture – knowing the rules we play by! Cf. 3:14-17. Daily reading is so important: it is the diet that our mind feeds on

ü Prayer – talking and listening: Phil 4:6-7: the path of peace.

ii) a disciplined lifestyle. The athlete is careful about what he eats, leisure activities, getting enough sleep. So should we! Greek philosophers used the word we translate ‘self control’ to mean the opposite to over-indulgence in food, drink, sex and pleasure: all these things are good gifts from God in the right place and proportion.

3) The farmer (6)

Self control is about tuning our lives into God’s time frame, keeping in step with the Spirit.

i) hard work. Just because the Spirit’s involved doesn’t mean that self control is easy: Heb 5:7-8; Phil 2:12-13

ii) certain outcome: crops will come; God gives the growth! Gal 6:7-9.

iii) sensitive to the seasons: a time to plough, sow, manure, harvest, leave fallow. Same is true of ministry to each other: 1 Cor 14:32-33.

The list of the Holy Spirit’s fruit ends with this marvellous thought: self control implies a virtuous circle: we need self control to keep in step with the Spirit and it is the Spirit himself who grows self control in us. So God gives us the means to keep in step with him. In that sense, self control is foundational to all the other fruit – it can grow because we keep in step with the Spirit. Therefore let’s be encouraged!

Possible areas of discussion

· What is self control? How does it differ from ‘positive thinking’ and ‘doing our own thing’? (The key here is motivation. Christian self control is motivated by a desire to do the will of God.)

· In which areas do we find it hardest to exercise self control? (Be general: talk about eating, working, jobs around the house, cleaning the car, visiting relatives, writing letters.)

· Why is self control so hard? Or why do we find it so easy to put off to tomorrow what we ought to do today?

· The soldier, according to Paul, steers clear of civilian entanglements: how does this apply to us as Christians? What are the entanglements we should steer clear of? How?

· A soldier’s self control involves doing nothing that would disgrace his uniform: what is the uniform that the Christian should not disgrace? (Look at Col 3:12-17. Don’t use this as a way of bringing everyone into condemnation but ponder the qualities there that Paul says we should put on and think about the way self control helps those qualities to grow in us. Brainstorm a bit on this one!)

· ‘Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me’: is this true?

· Is the tongue really as harmful and damaging as James says? How can we tame it? How can we help each other in this whole area of what we say and how we say it? (As well as James 3:1-12 look at the Proverbs passages listed in the notes and 1 Ti 5:13 and especially Eph 4:15; speaking the truth is easy. But speaking the truth in love requires a great deal of self control! Try to make the discussion practical: how can we keep a tighter rein on our tongues?)

· When does sharing information for prayer become gossip? How do we tell one another that we’ve crossed the all-too hazy dividing line between them?

· Is it ever right for a Christian to lose his/her temper? (Look at Jesus in the temple, study his invective against the Pharisees in Mt 23, look at Eph 4:26. Losing one’s temper implies losing control which tends to suggest that anger is OK but losing one’s temper. What do you think?)

· How do we train every day like an athlete? (Talk about devotional life: scripture reading, prayer, other reading, meditation etc. Get people to share what works for them, stress that there is no right or wrong way to have a quiet time: what matters is that we each spend quality time each day with God. Let’s encourage one another to do that.)

· Are there seasons in the life of the Christian and the church that we need to be aware of? (Ecclesiastes 3 might help here!)

· What does 1 Cor 14:32-33 mean in terms of our ministry to one another?